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When Urashima returns to his room, he closes the door behind him and leans against it for a moment, standing silently in the dark with one hand behind him, palm agains the door and his other hand across his chest, holding his letter and picture close. He’ll turn the light on eventually but right now, he just needs a second.
This is how their first day went? It feels more real than the day before which is all a blur to him but it still doesn’t feel real. So really, he just stands there in the dark for a moment, letting everything sink in. Gilbert and Alisha are dead. They’re dead? They’re really, really dead and that’s something he should accept, right?
Something soft brushes against the side of his cheek and he lets out a held breath, remembering he isn’t alone. His free hand comes up to his shoulder, reaching to pet the top of Kamekichi’s head with a finger and he takes his next few steps into his room, turning the light on and sitting down on his bed.
Setting the picture and the letter down carefully with both hands, he smooths them out once and just sits.
“Do you see, Kamekichi?” He asks his friend, setting her down on the bed in front of him and holding up the picture for her to see. “Heh heh, it’s the first breakfast he made for you. I’m… I’m really glad… you got to meet him… S-sorry."
And he wipes at his eyes with the back of his hands and sleeves, trying to stop the flow of tears starting up all over again. He'd told himself he wouldn't cry anymore, at least, not right now when there were things that had to be done. But he hadn't thought of that at all, had he? The first day he'd gotten a chance to introduce Gilbert to Kamekichi was one of their last days together. He was really happy that day, you know? An easy week, an easy motive, a happy reunion? He'd really thought that this week was going to be better.
Urashima lets out a shakey breath and looks up at the ceiling light, blinking into it as he tries to calm his tears. He's okay. He's a Kotetsu so he can be strong right now. Once he's calm, he reaches for the envelope, fingers running over his name and feeling that sting in his eyes again.
No, not right now.
Carefully, he opens the letter and begins to read. It really does sound like him. Of course, he thinks, they were written by Gilbert but it's like he can hear him right now. Standing tall right there, serious and a little gloomy but kind. He'd always said he wasn't a kind person but Urashima knew that wasn't true. It's exactly what Break had said-- Gilbert is a kind person. Too kind, even? He isn't sure about that last part but he knows the first to be true.
As he reads, his vision becomes blurred and his hands begin to shake. So that's when this was written? Just the other day? The last day that he really remembers. The last clear real day he can really recall since this last whirlwind day.
The day Gilbert made him his last breakfast. He'd made him so many meals and had been unable to give anything back in return. He'd waited so many weeks and finally, finally found a way to return the favor at least in some small part and one cup of coffee hardly seems like enough after weeks worth of meals. Just one cup of coffee and a promise he wasn't able to keep on his end because Gilbert had done so much looking out for him and what had he been able to do?
Maybe he doesn't give himself enough credit but right now, he really doesn't feel like he's done enough at all.
Setting the letter down, he wraps his arms around himself and bends over, curling into himself and cries.
He's never really hurt like this until he'd arrived in this place and he never thought he'd hurt this much so many times. When Mikazuki died, when Cheshire died, and now? It hurts so much right in the middle of his chest and he cries because he feels like it could break him in half.
He feels like he could break in half right now and a part of him wonders if things would be easier if he just cast it aside and went back to just being a sword. It's hard being a person. People aren't like swords-- they're fragile and they hurt in too many ways but even if they break they keep going. He can't give up this pain because it's the one thing that separates him from them but he can't give in either.
Time doesn't stop, even for the grieving. There's a future to protect and he'll do his part, he promises.
This is how their first day went? It feels more real than the day before which is all a blur to him but it still doesn’t feel real. So really, he just stands there in the dark for a moment, letting everything sink in. Gilbert and Alisha are dead. They’re dead? They’re really, really dead and that’s something he should accept, right?
Something soft brushes against the side of his cheek and he lets out a held breath, remembering he isn’t alone. His free hand comes up to his shoulder, reaching to pet the top of Kamekichi’s head with a finger and he takes his next few steps into his room, turning the light on and sitting down on his bed.
Setting the picture and the letter down carefully with both hands, he smooths them out once and just sits.
“Do you see, Kamekichi?” He asks his friend, setting her down on the bed in front of him and holding up the picture for her to see. “Heh heh, it’s the first breakfast he made for you. I’m… I’m really glad… you got to meet him… S-sorry."
And he wipes at his eyes with the back of his hands and sleeves, trying to stop the flow of tears starting up all over again. He'd told himself he wouldn't cry anymore, at least, not right now when there were things that had to be done. But he hadn't thought of that at all, had he? The first day he'd gotten a chance to introduce Gilbert to Kamekichi was one of their last days together. He was really happy that day, you know? An easy week, an easy motive, a happy reunion? He'd really thought that this week was going to be better.
Urashima lets out a shakey breath and looks up at the ceiling light, blinking into it as he tries to calm his tears. He's okay. He's a Kotetsu so he can be strong right now. Once he's calm, he reaches for the envelope, fingers running over his name and feeling that sting in his eyes again.
No, not right now.
Carefully, he opens the letter and begins to read. It really does sound like him. Of course, he thinks, they were written by Gilbert but it's like he can hear him right now. Standing tall right there, serious and a little gloomy but kind. He'd always said he wasn't a kind person but Urashima knew that wasn't true. It's exactly what Break had said-- Gilbert is a kind person. Too kind, even? He isn't sure about that last part but he knows the first to be true.
As he reads, his vision becomes blurred and his hands begin to shake. So that's when this was written? Just the other day? The last day that he really remembers. The last clear real day he can really recall since this last whirlwind day.
The day Gilbert made him his last breakfast. He'd made him so many meals and had been unable to give anything back in return. He'd waited so many weeks and finally, finally found a way to return the favor at least in some small part and one cup of coffee hardly seems like enough after weeks worth of meals. Just one cup of coffee and a promise he wasn't able to keep on his end because Gilbert had done so much looking out for him and what had he been able to do?
Maybe he doesn't give himself enough credit but right now, he really doesn't feel like he's done enough at all.
Setting the letter down, he wraps his arms around himself and bends over, curling into himself and cries.
He's never really hurt like this until he'd arrived in this place and he never thought he'd hurt this much so many times. When Mikazuki died, when Cheshire died, and now? It hurts so much right in the middle of his chest and he cries because he feels like it could break him in half.
He feels like he could break in half right now and a part of him wonders if things would be easier if he just cast it aside and went back to just being a sword. It's hard being a person. People aren't like swords-- they're fragile and they hurt in too many ways but even if they break they keep going. He can't give up this pain because it's the one thing that separates him from them but he can't give in either.
Time doesn't stop, even for the grieving. There's a future to protect and he'll do his part, he promises.
